Embracing Compassionate Detachment: A Necessary Skill for Empathic Healthcare Professionals

To Decrease Burnout,

Create Energetic Boundaries

Empathy and compassion are highly desirable traits in healthcare professionals. These traits allow patients to feel really seen and heard rather than feeling they’re simply cogs in the wheels of the medical machine. 

Empathy allows those who provide health care to truly step into their patients' shoes, to feel and understand what the person in front of them is experiencing. It’s what we all want to experience as patients. 

High levels of empathy in medicine are linked to many positive impacts, including an increased sense of safety, higher adherence to treatment recommendations, improved patient outcomes, and greater satisfaction with the healthcare experience. 

Some studies have suggested that many physicians miss patients’ emotional cues. So, if you’re one of those clinicians sharing the gift of empathy with your patients, kudos.

Because empathy is such a valued trait when delivering health care, it’s essential to create energetic boundaries so you can continue to show up fully for your patients while also protecting yourself from emotional exhaustion and burnout. 

What is Compassionate Detachment? 

Before we get to the heart of compassionate detachment, we must first understand empathy and compassion. 

According to the Merrium-Webster dictionary, empathy allows you to “vicariously experience the feelings, thoughts, and experience of another”, while compassion is the “consciousness of others' distress together with a desire to alleviate it”.

Constantly tapping into and feeling compelled to alleviate your patient’s pain, fear, and suffering can take its toll. 

That’s why compassionate detachment is an essential skill for empaths in healthcare. It allows you to be fully present with your patients while protecting yourself from eventual emotional overload. 

Compassionate detachment allows you to be fully present with your patient while distancing yourself from your patients' burdens.

It doesn’t mean you don’t care. It means you recognize you can’t carry the collective weight of your patients’ pain and worry and not expect your well-being to be impacted.

It becomes a matter of learning to tack between compassion and detachment so you can support your patients without allowing your patients’ emotional distress to sink you. 

Developing the Skill of Compassionate Detachment

Three steps to use as you build your skills of compassionate detachment include:

Enlist your active listening skills. 

Active listening means you’re fully tuned-in to your patient, listening to what they have to say, and maintaining curiosity. You can help your patient feel seen and heard without taking on their emotions. 

If you feel yourself being pulled into a patient’s emotion try naming the emotion to create a sense of “otherness” from the feeling. This way you can express understanding without staying IN the emotion. 

Focus on solutions.

As an empath, it might be easy to get caught in an emotion and stay there. Instead, lean into your problem-solving abilities. Once the patient feels heard, you can steer the focus toward finding ways to improve the patient’s situation.

Whenever possible, let the patient take the lead in the decision-making process. By emphasizing your role as a guide and helper, you can more easily deter yourself from taking ownership of your patient’s situation. 

Reframe the situation.

It’s common to encounter negative emotions throughout the course of your day. Tension and stress can cause people to act out in ways they might otherwise not. Most often, you are not to blame for a patient’s frustration, fear, or anger.

Pause to recognize this. Provide understanding and compassion, but don't’ make it a habit to accept responsibility that isn’t yours. 

Create Your Energetic Boundaries

If these strategies sound challenging, learn how to support yourself as you practice compassionate detachment. 

During a patient encounter, you can use simple mindfulness exercises to create distance between you and your patient’s emotions. 

For example, taking a few slow, deep breaths can calm your nervous system. You might visualize briefly “touching” the patient’s emotion as you breathe in and then returning it to them as you breathe out. 

Alternatively, if an emotion becomes too intense, you can try creating separation by shifting your attention to the patient. Pay exquisite attention to something about the patient, the color of her eyes or the timbre of his voice. 

If you tend to absorb negative emotions as you see patients, be sure to intentionally release them at the end of the day.

Again, simple mindfulness techniques, such as slow breathing with an extended exhale, can be helpful. 

You might also find it helpful to discharge the emotions through journaling by moving them out of your mind and body and onto paper. You can also incorporate your favorite types of movement to release energy. 

As always, remember to prioritize your well-being and don’t forget to give yourself compassion. Make it a habit to incorporate self-care practices into your daily routine. Experiment with what feels good to you. 

Though it sometimes feels like the world expects it of you, remember you can’t control everything. Focus on providing your best medical care and treating your patient as you wish to be treated. Spending time and energy carrying the weight of situations outside of your control doesn’t help you or your patient. 

Finally, always remember you deserve support, too. If you feel overwhelmed, give yourself permission to ask for help. 

If, at first glance, the idea of compassionate detachment feels a bit like abandoning your patient, allow yourself to consider its benefits. 

Creating energetic boundaries decreases your risk of compassion fatigue and emotional exhaustion. When you allow yourself to set down worry and negative emotions, you make room for improved focus and better decision-making. 

Practicing compassionate detachment lets you build emotional resilience over time.

You may find yourself becoming more adept at handling situations that would have once thrown off your day.

Compassionate detachment can be your ally in preventing or recovering from burnout. And that benefits both you and your patients in the long run. 

Want to learn more about mental focus and decision fatigue? Check out this blog.

Ready for 1:1 support from someone who understands your empathic nature? Learn more about working with me here.